A Year Ago (A Ramble)….

The night before I met up with some friends and had dinner at a restaurant, shared smiles, laughs and hugs without a care. The very next day we were in quarantine as a result of COVID-19 hitting the world and finally making it’s way to the US. What a time. It started out as a ‘temporary state’, maybe a few weeks, months, who knows? I never would have thought that toilet paper would be the rarest commodity. A few weeks spent scrounging for groceries and amazon delivery times, really wishing I was better prepared for disasters, but also who wants to live in fear? Feeling like the world may actually end and wishing I hadn’t waited 2 years to see my family, since now I may never have the chance again.

It was stressful in the early months... next-level anxiety, being thrust into the unknown and having to learn how to swim and trust in uncertainty. It was a process that unfolded over time and the journey was pretty volatile. COVID, plus an insane election year full of Trump antics and crucial BLM movement and protests taking place all at the same time. It’s been emotional, overwhelming at times and important daily.

On the business side, all of our wedding and event clients postponed or canceled their dates. There was a lot of heartache and many emotional rollercoasters, all while trying to hold it together and remain hopeful. It has been a strong lesson in balance, feeling it all and finding a way back to center. I’ve shifted (I’m SO over the word pivot), I’ve expanded Huntress offerings, started #flowertherapy to brighten days, I’ve altered my focus, I began sending emails and writing blogs and working on digital courses…all things that were on my never-ending to-do list before, but now I finally had the time.

I also rested, embraced the pause, found peace in trusting that this is what is meant for us now and finding the lessons within it. Noticing the ‘beauty in the everyday’, as I have for years, but now it went a little deeper. This has given flowers more meaning in my life than ever. Taking an unexpected year off financially has a way of putting things into perspective.

On a personal note, I dove into all the self care I could until I burned out on it…workshops, breath-work, meditation, zooms with friends, reaching for meaning and connection any where I could. I got my blood-work done, discovered food sensitives, changed my diet. They were saying we would open back in April, then May, then summer, then who knows when. I immersed myself into Yoga Teacher Training, because why not? I’ve been wanting to get back to the mat for years and now I finally had the time.

When you realize that your entire life can change in one day, the most important things rise quickly to the surface. It’s easier to prioritize when it’s quiet, when you’re still, when you have no other choices. Solutions find their way to the top. All of this happened in the right time for me. The foundation I had built, and was building, is helping me navigate through to the other side of this.

I allowed myself to take chances again, to dream, to open my heart, to repeatedly jump, to feel ALL the feelings and mostly to feel ALIVE. That’s what we’re here for.

What has come forth for me most during this year is COMMUNITY, SURRENDER, and LOVE.

COMMUNITY | We aren’t meant to do this human experience alone. I’ve learned who matters, who has my back, how to ask for and receive help, to trust and to hold those I love close and prioritize relationships. To be present. To take in those smiles, laughs, conversations, to listen, to hold space, to be in the moment. Fuck the phone, social media, comparison, and self doubt. These things really won’t matter in the end. The truth is within your heart and those that truly see you will remind you of that.

SURRENDER | We were never in control and we never will be. So we can hang on tight, stress, grind our teeth and tighten our bodies… or simply loosen our grip, take a deep exhale, trust, let go, and enjoy the ride. Mindset is everything, we have choices and we decide how we react and flow through this life we’ve been given.

LOVE | I’ve been a chronic people pleaser, and I’ve finally learned to love myself first. I choose me now. I have been there for me my entire life and I will be there for me until my last breath. I can count on me always. This practice has allowed me to open my heart again. And through that, I’ve seen that I can count on so many others too. I’ve built an insanely beautiful tribe of people in my circle over the years - I am the luckiest. I knew this before, but this time has reinforced the strength of those bonds. In the past, I’ve stayed too long in relationships that didn’t deserve me. I’ve closed my heart after allowing it to be broken. In loving me, I’ve realized I deserve the love of others. I deserve people that will show up consistently, that will love all of me, including the supposed ‘flaws’. I love who I am, I love the people I carry in my heart, I love the highs and lows, the depth, the rawness, the realness, the feeling of love, the warmth in my heart and my being. I choose LOVE over everything else. What a gift we have right within us.

This photo sums it up for me... the juxtaposition of beauty in heartbreak, happiness in grief, and holding all that blossoms within the grit. This is what we stand for, this is the spirit of HUNTRESS.

My heart goes out to you. Whether you’re having a hard time, experiencing grief, loss, and struggling with the uncertainty or if you’ve been thriving in 2020/21....or maybe you’re feeling a bit of both and riding the waves of all of it. I hope this year has brought you some insight. Although there have been extremely difficult times, the lessons can be abundant. I hope you have found and continue to find peace and clarity in your heart. In whatever way feels best for you. 🙏🏼💐🖤

Alignment, Clarity, and Flow

As someone who hustled hard for years and years and, let’s be honest, for TOO many years — I am officially declaring that I am OVER the word “hustle.”

Hustle culture can be a dangerous, slippery slope that too many creatives, young professionals, and entrepreneurs — and, let’s be honest, really ANYONE can — become a sufferer of.

Myself included.

This “hustle culture” is devoted to work, work, work, and more work.

I want more. I want to LIVE, to enjoy, to experience, to feel the highs and lows, and find a balance within it all.

It really comes down to a couple questions for me that I’ve pondered over the passing years, asking myself these questions as I sought to step back from hustling so hard.

What do I want my daily life to look and feel like?
How do I define success?
What am I manifesting?

After many pauses, deep breaths and embracing stillness… it’s become about alignment for me. Aligning myself to my hopes and dreams, yes, and also aligning myself to my everyday, too. Flowing seamlessly in and out of the magnificent and the mundane. Seeing both as a way of life that I am personally manifesting for myself.

It all begins with clarity. Without clarity, there is questioning and confusion, resulting in the universe not knowing what to present to you.

Instead of confusion, I seek clarity.

Clarity in knowing what I want my life to look like.
Clarity in knowing where I’m headed and what I desire.
Clarity in fulfilling the ideas in my head, the desires of my heart.

Because, at the end of the day, I want clarity. I want alignment. I want my life to FLOW.

And, this is what I wish for you, too.

There’s no need to dread Monday on Sunday evenings.
There is space to take captive every single day and see beauty in each one, because each day (including a dreaded Monday!) is a gift.

There’s no need to grind 9-to-5 every day, hustling harder and harder until you are unhappy and burn out.
There is opportunity for a better way! There is more to you — you are capable of so much better, of so much more.

There’s no need to wish your life away waiting for Fridays when you can finally punch the clock for the weekend.
There is a place for you, instead, to align with your purpose, your true calling and not feel like you’re only living for the weekend.

So yes, I am officially over HUSTLE, and instead, I am aligning and seeking clarity and flowing. Flowing deeply and beautifully, in and out of the treasures — big and small — that this life has to offer.

And I invite you to do the same! ✨

Holiday Grounding Practice

Today, we want to guide you in a short, but impactful grounding exercise, a few moments to take just for YOU. Follow the prompts outlined below, and feel free to eventually make them your own. Enjoy!

Make yourself comfortable.

Maybe that’s a seated position in a chair or on the couch, or laying on the floor or in your bed.
Find a cozy space to be in, and a comforting position to relax into. Maybe you have a favorite blanket to wrap up in, light a candle or some incense, apply your favorite essential oil

Take a few deep breaths

These may simply begin as regular breaths at first. Bringing awareness to your breath is enough.
Eventually try to deepen your inhales and lengthen your exhales with each breath that passes through your lungs.

Soften your gaze.

As you come to a more relaxed spot, drop your eyelids ever so slightly.
Begin to journey inward, closing your eyes between reading the prompts, if that feels comfortable to you.

Check in with your senses and the space around you.

What do you see in your surrounding space?
What are you feeling around you?
What sounds do you hear?
What are you experiencing in the space that you are in right now?
Simply notice, without judgement.

Take inventory of your body.

What areas of your body can you extend awareness to?
Breathe into any areas that you feel tension. Perhaps you can release further into your seat, drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw, relax your forehead.
Scan your way up and down your body until you feel more at ease.

Be intentional about feeling grounded in the present as your mind journeys.

Think back to a fond moment or even a place that brings you joy, and imagine yourself there.
What do you see? Smell? Hear?
Listen, really listen.
Feel, really feel. As if you are back in that exact place. That precise moment in time.
Perhaps you are alone or sharing the experience with someone.
What about that memory brings you joy?

Take a few more deep, slow, continuous breaths. Inhale through your nose and audibly exhale through your mouth. Let it all go.

When you're ready, begin adding slight movement back into your body, gently wiggle your feet and hands, curve your lips into a smile and slowly open your eyes.

And now, go about your day — hopefully feeling more centered, more grounded.

And if the holidays feel chaotic, or a moment becomes overwhelming — be intentional about taking a few minutes out of your day to listen to your needs, to focus on your senses, to check in with your body, and to ground yourself.